A Sense of Relevance

In ancient times, much greater days, the Mures Valley was the most prosperous region in known Europa, envy of every province, target of every greedy intent. Under a benevolent sky reigned a benevolent King. The King brought glory and fame to his clans, promising eternal life for their name and kin; lasting relevance. Lasting, that is, until this relevance was taken from us.

mureslord

Take pride, Muresdol, in that King. Remember him now that he glimmers most faintly.

Advertisements

Slaying the Nerich Bear

Coa_Romania_Town_Marosvásárhely.svg
Targu Mures Coat of Arms

During the harsh centuries ruled by the Nerich clan, many evil men and beasts had employment in the Mures Valley. Some argue that the most brutal of all was the bitter, but ruthless Torben “Bear” Nerich.

Torben, originally from the Principality of Hanover, traveled to Transylvania to harvest Almonds. However, once he arrived he found other tasks; those of violence and hatred.

The bitter bear was beloved only by the whining and very weak willed women of the windy Valley. But he was hated by any with strong will and opinion. United under the banner of Petru Major, the Mures mob slayed the Bear. His head pierced by the sword of a red rebel. The uprising is celebrated to this day…

nerich
The Nerich Bear

Targu Mures Historical Society

Involvement of the Nerich clan in the ethnic clashes of Târgu Mureș

1990_Marosvasarhely
Târgu Mures during the ethnic clashes

The ethnic clashes of 1990 is one of many sad chapters in Târgu Mureş’ proud history. Situated in Transylvania, at the borders of Szeklerland, the Mures Folk speaks many languages and belongs to many cultures. To honor this, our patron Jacob Tepec founded the Cultural Palace, where he amongst other praised Hungarians and their qualities (reactionary and Nerichian scholars of modern Romania argue that this was simply a display of black humor), and held several exhibits showing important Romanian and Slavic folklore. However, the open-mindedness and multiculturalism of Tepec became less normal, peoples of different letters felt that their pride and lands where stolen. And the long dormant Evil of the Nerich Clan was woken once again.

Without the involvement of the Nerich clan, the disputes and quarrels would have been peacefully solved by discussion and debates at the very Cultural Palace. But the wisdom of old Tepec did not penetrate the anger of the Nerich-infected minds. Many people died.

etnic
A sad chapter (cultural palace in background)

Krimean Heresy in the Islamic State (IS/ISIS)

krimisis
Artist’s impression of Krimean archeological treasures. What is buried in the Syrian sands?

Ancient cities, Ancient Kingdoms, Krimean connection. El-Fahir, Holy Algorithm. Nerich, Syria traveler. Early Krimean cultures.

These are notes in the margin of the Holy Qu’ran belonging to an unfortunate fighter in the Syrian war. The Targu Mures Historical Society is surprised indeed to receive such words from this war-torn corner of the earth. Yet we will be wise to remember Krim’s eternal attributes and wide influence – growing ever wider!

We hope to devote more time to this new avenue of research in the coming year, and pray for the emancipation of the Syrian people and their Krimean treasures.

Ovi Dänânae, Targu Mures Historical Society

The Unallocated

The Unallocated suffered severely under the iron hand of Jerna Nerich. While she swelled from fatty almond feasts, the poor thralls at the bottom of the feudal ladder had no sustenance but moss and moldy crumbs.

Lakes of Targu Mures

The matriarch took her biannual baths in the many ponds and lakes in our Mures Valley. In azure gown she would wallow like the Hippopotamus Amphibius of sub-Saharan Africii. Woe be to him of The Unallocated that was set on toweling duties.

Oh, what will thy next project be, Unallocated One? Releas’d from agony perhaps only in death.

Wise we would be never to forget The Unallocated, the unprofitable. From their caste would rise, in time, that great Red Rebel!

Have you met my friend, the Krimean?

Almond under microscope
Almond under microscope

Folk song from the Nerich valley. Traditionally performed by drâgospel/jew harp quartet in late-Transylvanian waltz-beat.

Have you met my friend,
the Krimean?
No, for he is
no friend of mine.

Have you met this stranger,
The Krimean?
No, for he was banished
from the valley

Have you met my enemy,
The Krimean?
Yes, I have seen him
in nightmares

Have you met my friend
The Krimean?
Leave me now,
I tire of your joke

Almond Grove
Almond Grove

Prayer of the Crimean-Catholic order

Monastery of the ancient Crimean Order
Monastery of the ancient Crimean Order

Recovered from monastery tomes donated to the Targu Mures Historical Society:

Semel in Chersonesum relegatus
Propterea dic ad Khmer cælaturas
Iuvenis filius praevaricationis Jacob
primogenitus

Audio fidelium canunt
Natus est rex
Krim Jacob, vivet in aeternum
Quoniam die illa benedicta

Et Nerich tubis canere!
Audi quid dicat:
Illuc usque in sempiternum in tenebris,
Quia in die illa, quod damnatus

Ian Whitehouse has been so kind as to translate for the plebeian masses:

Once in the Crimea
Tell the Khmer carvings
Of the transgression of this young
son Jacob, the firstborn.

I hear the faithful sing
A king must have arrived
Krim Jacob will live forever
we are blessed this day.

And the trumpets of Nerich yell!
They tell us:
Crimea is forever in darkness
since that damned day

Jacobie, Jacobie (The passion of Jacobie I)

Upon that tree
Upon that tree

Jacobie was a Krímìnale. For this he was punished severely in the great gorge of hollow-horned mammals. From the Neerich-ian clan it was claimed that he had thieved as follows:

  • 10 Cherry Boston Players
  • 3 Hen birds (France)
  • 12-cylinder girls (who danced eight international agreements)
  • 2 friends and Pterici
  • 17 “Please note that the swimming pool” signs
  • 5 de L’mei Čelebić gold medals

Kyan was especially upset about the kidnapping of his most beloved, Pterici (his friends not so much). Kyan spoke in parable:

Before the blood sword legacy of the Sky King,
the courage of the swelling;
sword and Crimeajacobiianians
rushed into the sea
all their sons for Unabashed Pterici.

People now offer the spear to him – Sky King.

Jacobie was nailed to the Scapegoat tree in that grand gorge. His dying words:

Alien flesh-eating goats for youth and children!
Clothing, tyres, waste, there are many other things.

And there was not a man in the valley who understood, but one.

Nerich in struggle with hollow-horned mammal
Nerichian in struggle with hollow-horned mammal

Peer Nerich – A Soul of Eternal Violence

During the dark years of the Nerich reign, few men were feared more than the vicious Peer “The Mountain” Nerich. As the commander of the castle dungeons he became the most experienced and gruesome torturer the Mures Valley has ever seen. As the nephew of Lord Gregorius, he obeyed his uncle and master in every task. He happily did his work with great joy and fantasy. His methods ripped many soul apart, making them scream of agony, suffering in both body and mind.

His methods of torture were many, some aimed at the mind and soul and many at the flesh and gut of his subjects. But at his worst he ripped it all apart, sucking and squeezing  every trace of life out of his victim. The agony of the victims lasted for days, or maybe weeks, before the relief of death. One could tell Peer both true and false, good or evil, but his  would not stop, and ones body were mistreated until the very end.  The very fear of The Mountain made the Mures town folk silent and submissive.

The Mures town folk still dread Peer Nerich and his wicked ways, although he is believed dead. But his body was never found after the Krim uprising, and there is whispers that his evil soul still lurk in the darkest forests, waiting for a new opportunity to serve his master and rule the Mures Valley.

It is still said that his blood was not red, but black as the darkest moonless night.

Adrŷan Nerich – Historian –  Targu Mures Historical Society

Jacob Tepec and the Scapegoats

In the long years of terror in the Mures Valley one man in particular was feared by the humble townsfolk. Peer Nerich was the right hand of the vicious Lord Kyan and he issued fear and horror upon the community. The dread that Peer would expel one from the valley and send one to the town of Scapegoats were massive.

The town of Scapegoats was a prison where people were punished in the most horrid ways. The only food they got were rotten almonds, and the none of the problems they were set to solve had a polynomial solution. The prisoners, called the Scapegoats, did not last long with these beastly circumstances and countless minds were eradicated.

Due to the unjust sufferings of the Scapegoats, Jacop Tepec decided that the data structure he and Igal Galperin worked on should forever be called the Scapegoat Tree.

Ovi Dänânae – Historian – Targu Mures Historical Society